Pasta

What is the one food that tempts you the most? And I don't mean some sort of special treat, some rare indulgence, I mean the food that you eat the most, the food you just can't get enough of? No question about mine, it's pasta. It sounds funny coming from someone with a weight problem, but there really aren't many foods that I actually like, at least consistently. The only food I always like is pasta. Pasta is fine in moderation, but I have no concept of moderation when it comes to pasta. I eat it often, but worst of all, I eat huge portions of it, absolutely huge. I always, always stuff myself silly when I eat pasta. You know how I mentioned that I am always in physical pain after eating dinner? That I sit on my couch and try to catch my breath? The culprit is often these mammoth sized bowls of pasta. Oh, and I cover it in sauce and grated cheddar. Way too much grated cheddar. Gigantic pile o' pasta and cheese, basically. And I'm not even a huge fan of cheese, but on pasta I can't get enough of it.

Well, tonight I decided to have pasta for dinner. I'm cutting way back on the amount of pasta I'm going to eat each week, but I'm still going to eat it. As I said in my first post, I am not going on a diet, I am learning how to eat better. I am changing my relationship with food, I am trying to treat my body better instead of punishing it. So much like the first time I went to a bar after I quit smoking, my first time eating pasta after making the decision to change how I eat was a big test. I started to add the pasta to the boiling water...OK a little more...a little more...and then I stopped. And I could still see the bottom of the pot. OK, this is progress. Once it was cooked and I poured it into the strainer, it didn't look like much. I thought to myself "How the hell is this supposed to fill me up? I'm going to be hungry again in an hour!" Well, it just goes to show how screwed up my perception of food is, because I ate it all...and I'm full. But not uncomfortably full, just full. So you're telling me a normal sized portion of pasta really is filling? I don't have to eat 3 or 4 or 5 servings? This is messed up. I don't get it.